I had someone tell me not long ago after being sick that there for a day, they knew what it was like to be me as sick as I am and can not do anything much and they did not like it. I thought “for a day? You have no idea”. Part of me wanted to say if you want to know what it is like to be me, try it for a life time. What I did tell the person was they should appreciate that they were given another chance at a normal life because the next time, they might not get it.
How often people can think they understand what someone chronically ill, disabled, grieving the loss of a loved one, lost a child, lost their home or other traumatic things are going through because they may have experienced it in a smaller way. I pray for this person daily for I never want them to really know what it is like to be me. My prayer is no one ever really knows what it is like to be me. I would not want my enemies to have to endure much less those I love.
Son asks me why I watch the shows like the woman with the 60 pound tumor. I told him it was to remind me that there is always someone worse than I am and that I have no idea what they go through.
I got this in an email just now and I thought it was so appropriate for this topic. I hope you enjoy.
THE WORLD IS MINE
Today, upon a bus, I saw a very beautiful woman
And wished I were as beautiful.
When suddenly she rose to leave,
I saw her hobble down the aisle.
She had one leg and wore a crutch.
But as she passed, she gave a smile.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have two legs; the world is mine
I stopped to buy some candy.
The lad who sold it had such charm.
I talked with him, he seemed so glad.
If I were late, it’d do no harm.
And as I left, he said to me,
“I thank you, you’ve been so kind.
It’s nice to talk with folks like you.
You see,” he said, “I’m blind.”
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have two eyes; the world is mine.
Later while walking down the street,
I saw a child I knew.
He stood and watched the others play,
but he did not know what to do.
I stopped a moment and then I said,
“Why don’t you join them dear?”
He looked ahead without a word.
I forgot, he couldn’t hear.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have two ears; the world is mine.
With feet to take me where I’d go..
With eyes to see the sunset’s glow.
With ears to hear what I’d know.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I’ve been blessed indeed, the world is mine.
I read this quote the other day and thought it was beautiful. I am poor and have nothing really to leave my children except what I have given them from the heart that will carry them on through their own lives
“No legacy is so rich as Honesty.”
~ William Shakespeare~
And so I lay here thinking about what I tried to teach my children. Yes, top of the list was honesty and if you read my post just yesterday about going through discomfort for the lasting good, you will see that my son is passing that legacy on with his daughter. The legacy of always telling the truth, not bending it or telling only parts of truths for there are no half-truths. A half truth is still a lie. While a person can fool others, they should remember that someone somewhere will always know the truth.
You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all the people all the time.
~ Abraham Lincoln~
Other things I hope that I leave with my children when I leave here is compassion and charity for others. I have always believed that what you give out…be it good or bad..comes back to you ten fold. And I have seen it time and time again in my life.I think there is no greater feeling of joy than when we are doing something to help someone else. I watch both my sons and they are quick to reach out and help. They take that step and ask nothing in return. I love when I see one of my sons go across a parking lot to help someone who is having trouble loading their groceries or is having car trouble. And I love when I hear they have gone to help a family in trouble or to take them food. I remember one time in specific where we gave half of our food to someone who was in need even though we had no money to get anymore. And yet, two days later, a neighbor came by and asked could they give us food as their freezer had died and it would just go to waste and they gave us twice as much as we gave away.
“Fear grows out of the things we think; it lives in our minds. Compassion grows out of the things we are, and lives in our hearts.”
Another thing I hope I have given my sons and leave them a legacy of is love and how to love themselves and to love others. I think we all have the capacity to love but if we are not taught to love in the right way, we can go down paths that lead us into destructive behavior. Real love is honest and compassionate so they are all intertwined. I hope I taught my sons to love without expectations as love is something you should give freely. I hope I taught them to love all people and to love in spite of not because of. And I hope they learned to love with forgiveness. And I pray they learned the difference in liking something or someone and loving them for we will like many things in our lives but we may not always love them.
“It’s not about how much you do, but how much love you put into what you do that counts.”
- Mother Teresa-
All of these things seem to go hand in hand. Another thing I hope that I have given my sons is the understanding of the power of forgiveness and how important it is in life. While some people may ask us to forgive them, usually forgiveness is for ourselves so that we can move forward. If we hold on to anger and hurt, it is our lives we are tearing up. And if we can look at others and see behind their actions to the reason, forgiveness comes a lot easier and so does understanding that everyone acts in a different way.
“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.”
I hope I have engrained in them to always hope and dream and never give up so that they follow their dreams too. I think without hope and faith and dreams, we are lost. I love hearing both my sons tell me of their dreams for the future….dreams of living in the country for one and dreams of making this home into what he wants for the other. I love seeing the spark in their eyes when they talk of their dreams and what they are doing to make them come true.
“Hold fast to dreams. For if dreams die, life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly.”
James Langston Hughes
Another thing I hope I have left my children as my legacy is the value of hard work. Hard work not only helps us reach our dreams but it makes us who we are and makes us value what we worked for even more than if it were handed to us. Both of my sons are hard workers and I hope they continue to be so and hand it down to Sweetpea and any other children that may come.
“Far and away the best prize that life has to offer is the chance to work hard at work worth doing”
And so, when my time comes, I pray my legacy to my children includes honesty in all things, compassion and charity for others, love of themselves and others, the power of forgiveness, the ability to dream and hope and to work hard for their dreams and for those they love. These things will not be dollar bills but the value that they will bring is far greater than any fortune I could leave them.
And the very last thing I want them to have is the ability to always know who they are and to respect themselves and the values they carry.
Ever have one of those days where it seems like everything goes wrong? That has been my day today and then this afternoon I fell in the livingroom. I can still hear son’s heart wrenching cry “oh Mama” as he rushed to me. I have had a problem with falling lately and now son and I both are concerned it is the seizure issue for I can not tell you how I fell.
All I know is I fell face first, hit hard, landed on my bad knee..the one I wear the brace on and then hit the other knee. Bad knee looks like it has a large cantaloupe attached. My head hit the bottom of the recliner and both my wrists and shoulders hurt.I have bruises on my legs, knees, arms and a blood blister on my wrist where something made my watch dig into my wrist. Son had me packed in ice before I ever left the floor to come to my bed. Even my toes and feet feel like the bones are broken. And I have a headache. With me taking something to thin my blood, son is watching closely to make sure I do not show signs of internal bleeding. I feel sure nothing is broken. I am just banged up from head to toe.
I feel mugged and all I can say is ♫♫”I fought the floor and the floor won” ♫ ♫
video by johnnybgoede
This is one of those dupont and goodyear had a flat moments but give me a few days and like the phoenix rising out of the ashes I will be back up and going again. This is a setback but not one I can not handle. And I am thankful for a few things. I am thankful that the chair was on sliders and moved backwards when I hit it with my head for that made the blow a little easier. I am thankful that son was right here with me and was quick to get ice and help me to my bed. I am thankful that it was not worse and if I had to hurt a knee, at least it was the one already in a brace. Even Jack came running to check on his “mama” and make sure I am ok. And right now, I am so thankful for this gel mattress and hospital bed that makes it easier for me to get comfortable.
Wishing a great night.
I was resting and watching an old episode of the Walton Family. It was about the mustang horse and how people heard about this last mustang and came and caught it and put it on display beside this store. It upset the grandfather Walton so bad that he was almost in tears and said he would figure out a solution. The next morning, he got up and started making a branding iron. The kids standing around kept saying “but grandpa, you said you would never do that to any of the animals on the mountain. He explained that by doing this which will hurt a little, much good was going to come and the mustang would then be able to run free until he died. And then he said this:
“There are times in life we must go through some discomfort to arrive at lasting good”
From the time we are children…we will have to go through uncomfortable times…through discomfort to arrive at the lasting good. When we as parents have to discipline our children, it is not an easy thing to do but we know we must so that they will develop morals and ethics to last them a life time.When we have to take medicine, it is with discomfort but it is for the lasting goodness of being well. When we have to take jobs that we really do not want but need at the moment…it is a time of discomfort to arrive at the lasting goodness and having money to pay our bills and put food on the table is the that lasting goodness.
Life will always have hard times and painful times and growing times. But, those things, while uncomfortable, are what make us the person we are…that bring us to the everlasting good…that bring us to the honesty and ethics so necessary in a world gone wrong. The uncomfortable decisions may involve family, friends, work, church, doctors….anything that is keeping us from attaining the good in life.
As I was working on this post, I remembered a story my other son told me about my Sweetpea. She was getting ready to go to a party that she had looked forward to all week. They had asked her several times if she had taken something from her mother’s room and she had repeatedly told them no she did not.. While talking to her as she was finishing her hair for the party, she let slip that she had taken the item. Son stood there looking at her a minute and then told her that she had lied to them over and over about this and so now could not go to the party. That was a very hard thing for him to do because he knew how much the party meant, but to him, making her accountable for being dishonest with him was more important than the party. It was a hard decision and one that brought discomfort to him and to her both but it was for the greater good of her life. It was for the lasting good.
Standing up for what is right is not always comfortable but it definitely is for the good in life. Many times you will stand alone and many times you will face the lies and manipulations of those that are affected by you standing up for what is right. But, I can honestly say that the feeling in your heart when you know what you have made your stand is worth it all. Standing up for what is right does not just affect you but those around you. Many people will learn to stand up for what is right just by seeing you stand up for what is right.
“Challenges are what make life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.”
Often, people do not want to go through the hard decisions or the feelings of being uncomfortable in life to do what is right. It is much easier to go along with or to give in and when we do that, people can end up getting hurt in the process. I see parents who give in to the tirades and tantrums of their children because it is easier than standing strong and doing what is right when raising them. Some parents find it easier to try to be the child’s friend and not the child’s parent and do what is right for a child.
Sometimes we do that with friends too. We go along with what they are doing or saying because we do not want any conflict. It is too uncomfortable to say we disagree or that we think what they are doing is wrong. But, if we are really their friend, we will be honest with them and honest with ourselves for it is for the greater good of the friendship and for the greater good of ourselves. If a friend is a real friend, they will appreciate the honesty. If not, then they will move on to people who will not be as honest with them and will tell them only what the person wants to hear because that is more comfortable to them. And obtaining the lasting good is lost.
Be willing to be uncomfortable. Be comfortable being uncomfortable. It may get tough, but it’s a small price to pay for living a dream.
I can tell you that working for our dream of getting here, it was not always easy. We had to make hard decisions that affected our whole lives. The hardest decision we made was the day we signed the papers on the house on the other side of the mountain. The interest rate that we were told is not what was in the papers. Now, we could have just signed and walked out the new homeowners but it was more important that we stand up and say something. It affected our future and the money we would be paying. Owning the house was important to us at that time but it was more important that the deal be an honest one and that we get what we were told. And so, I questioned them in that deed office about the interest. Even my realtor said nothing. The one doing the signing called the bank and talked to them and they said “well the interest had changed from when we first talked to them”. Son looked at me with a look that said “what do we do”. I looked around the table and put our check back in my purse and said “well, then we do not sign” and started to get up. That was the hardest thing to do. But, before I got out of my seat the bank agreed to lower the interest to what they had told us to begin with.
God, make me so uncomfortable that I will do the very thing I fear.
I believe fear is a huge obstacle in our lives that holds us back. We fear what others will say or think. We fear the feelings of being uncomfortable in our choices even when it is the right thing to do. And fear stops us dead in our tracks from doing the uncomfortable things that are necessary for growth and for good in our lives. Fear can also make us complacent. We see someone stealing but fear keeps us from standing up and doing what is right for the lasting good of the person stealing and of those being stolen from. We see people hanging around our children but fear that our children will get mad makes us uncomfortable with standing up and saying to our children “you can not hang around those people anymore” and telling them why. Fear makes us complacent when it comes to politics. We do not want to take the time to study and learn about candidates. It is easier and more comfortable to either not vote or to just go vote for anyone. Fear makes us not stand up for ourselves and the discomfort at standing up seems to stop us from saying “I will not tolerate you treating me like this anymore”.
”Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old pain. The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding you back from a new life. What is it you would let go of today?” –Mary Manin Morrissey
Sometimes the discomfort for the greater good means making those around your, especially loved ones, be accountable for themselves. This is hard with children as we tend to want to protect them and make life easier but making it easier is not always the best choice for them to get that lasting good that comes from learning about life.
Just as Grandpa Walton did in the show, doing the thing we swore up and down we would never do is often necessary for the lasting goodness to come. Sometimes it is better to make someone mad or even to cause a little hurt when the good that will come from it is greater than the small amount of pain or suffering the decision causes.
Sometimes that discomfort comes to remind us that we need to stand up and do what is right. You know when you have done something you should not have done and you feel uncomfortable and uneasy about it for a day or two. Well, that is when the choice is still there for you to do what is right. It might feel uncomfortable to make amends or admit that what was done is not right but the lasting good when we do is what is important. If we squash those feelings of discomfort, what we do is deaden our moral compass until one day, we may never feel again that discomfort telling us we need to take action and do what is right. That is the day that we have lost a very important part of ourselves…our honesty and integrity. And we will have no moral compass to guide us for we have killed it.
It is necessary to feel that discomfort, to be reminded to do what is for the lasting good and to retain our ethics and honesty in life. It may hurt a little to stand up and do what is right but if we do not, the hurt will be greater in the long run.
- Get Uncomfortable (aprilbradham.wordpress.com)
- Ouch…exposed..vulnerable = Growth (deborahyishak.wordpress.com)
- Why Kids are Like Mustangs (Both Kinds) (livingsanegerously.com)
- Define… HAPPY! (rashelbell.wordpress.com)
- Learning to be Comfortable with Discomfort (everydayawe.com)
- Change Is Uncomfortable (toddlohenry.com)
- Uncomfortably comfortable (taochild.wordpress.com)
Life is so hard and we make so many twists and turns and have to make so many decisions that sometimes we wonder if we are doing the right thing. I have learned many things along this trail of mine and now am in the last third of my life and have found that these things sure make life so much easier. Sometimes we complicate things when we do not need to.
Below are things I have learned along the way and that took me years to learn and to reach the point I am at. I am not always right but one thing for certain….I am not always wrong either. Life is what we make it and if we can slow down and simplify life a little, then the life we can make is one that is so much more beautiful.
image from mekanna.blogspot.com
OLDER THAN DIRT WISDOM
Only our Creator knows when we will die. We will not die a day sooner or a day later, so leave the dying to the Creator , to our God and focus on living.
I get asked all the time am I worried about dying and my answer is no. I am too busy living and enjoying my loved ones and enjoying life. I will die when I am supposed to and no sooner.
Making decisions requires five things. It requires you to listen to God, to your head, to your heart, to your head again and finally listening to God again. Our hearts are wonderful things but sometimes they make us make decisions based on guilt, pity or some other emotion and then we find that we are miserable.
How we are made
I love this expression for it is so true. We were created with TWO ears and ONE mouth. I believe the intent was for us to listen twice as much as we talk. And because we only have one mouth, make what goes in and comes out be extremely gentle and easily digested.
Standing up for what is right
It is so easy to be passive and ignore the tragedies and wrong doings going on daily. We can not change the world but we can change what is in our corner of the world, one piece at a time….starting with ourselves. It is amazing how good it feels to stand up for what is right instead of going along with the crowd.
Distance makes for clarity
Sometimes we can be so close to something we can not see the reality. Stepping away for a while gives us that 20/20 vision we need to make smart decisions
Friends are a wonderful thing. Keep in mind 345 “friends” on Facebook does not make them friends. They are acquaintances. If you come through life with only ONE close friend, you have come through life with something very precious that will last you your whole life. And if you think that everyone on your Facebook is your friend, they are not. Watch people move from group to group once they are seen as they are. Real friends do not do that. They do not take advantage of your good heart or your generosity. They value you and they stay your friend. They may not always agree with you but they are honest enough to tell you the truth.
Never let a day go by without telling those you love that you love them. Actions speak louder than words, but they still love to hear the words too.
Never let the sun set on your anger. Each day that you allow anger to continue, it becomes easier to stay angry and never heal the gap. “Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.”~~Benjamin Franklin
Someone has to be the first to say I am sorry. Being sorry that there is a dispute does not mean that you are wrong. It means you are sorry that the difference in opinions or actions caused a riff.
When you find yourself angry, first ask yourself why. We are complex humans and sometimes we are angry because we are hurt, or tired or frustrated. We all get angry at times. But, remaining angry is our own choice.
We are not indispensable
In life here on earth, everyone can be replaced. No one is indispensable. Someone can always do the job we were doing. Never think you must stay where you are because something might fall apart without you. It won’t. Life will go on.
Communicating with Others
We all speak from our own “place” and we all use different words with our own definition. What means one thing to someone might mean something entirely different to another. Always ask “what do you mean by….?” for it saves many arguments. And don’t react until you are sure you know what the other person is Really saying.
It is OK to Say NO
It really is ok to say No, I can’t. …No, I don’t want to….and not get caught up in things we really do not want to do. I remember too many times agreeing to do something and then wanting to kick myself afterwards. Those that love you will still love you if you say no. They might get mad for a little bit, but they will get over it. Don’t say yes out of guilt. You will hate yourself afterwards. And the more you learn to say no, the more you will find you have time to do the things you really love, with those you love.
Take Life in Bites
I read once that the first bite of food, no matter the item, is the best taste. Each bite after dims in great flavor as your taste buds get used to is. I love going to buffet’s and I take one small spoonful of each thing and sit and savor the flavors. My plate looks like a sampler. So sample life one bite at a time. Too much of something dulls the excitement and flavor. Remember the days of youth. How exciting things were. Rekindle that as a child. We don’t have to have everything but we can feel like we do by enjoying what we have.
Laughter is a great healer and helps you to get rid of stress. I have laughed til I cried even in the midst of really hard times. We do not have to be all serious or sad or down and never laugh again just because something bad happened. Laughter often serves to break a tense moment, and to keep us from getting angry over something that really is not worth getting angry over. It helps to relieve tension in one of the most beautiful ways. Laughter is a choice. Laugh a lot and enjoy life. And most of all, learn to laugh at yourself. I do it all the time.
Never Defend Something Blindly
Believe and have faith in what you believe in but always make sure you are defending it with facts and not just emotion. When you defend something, ask yourself “why?” and the reasons should be more than “it’s wonderful” or “it’s great”. You should be able to tell valid reasons. Otherwise we become like the groupies who follow this or that star all over the globe but can’t really give you a good reason why. When you have your reasons…good valid reasons…defending your position becomes much easier.
Don’t Depend on Others for Happiness or Validation
Our happiness should never hinge on “things” or “people” for those things can disappear. It comes from inside us. Neither should we let someone be the only thing that validates us or tells us we are worthy. For they are only human. Learn to validate yourself. You know when you have done a good job or when you have done something worthy. Be proud of that and validate from within that what you did is good.
Treat Each Day Like It Is Your Last
Every day is a gift. Treat each day like it is your last and see the wonder and awe in each one. Live your life as if today is your last, making sure to mend all fences that have been broken, making sure to say I love you often, making sure to always do your part.
Refine your Moral Compass
We usually know when we are doing something we should not be doing. If we are feeling uncomfortable, unhappy, angry, etc with what we are doing….it is time to step away from it and figure out why. Sometimes, people know they are doing wrong and just do not care. That is why it is so important that we refine our moral compass to be that of knowing right from wrong.
Value The Important Things, Know What Can Be Lost and What Destroys
These 3 things once gone you can never get back: Time, words and opportunity
These 3 things in life can destroy a person: anger, pride and unforgiveness.
These 3 things in life are the most important: Love, family/friends and kindness
whatever value you place on yourself…others will too. We teach others how to treat us. If we do not treat ourselves with respect, no one else with either. If we do not stand up for ourselves, no one else will either. And if we do not love ourselves, how can we expect others to?
Life and what we do is a choice. No one forces us. There is always a choice. It may not be what we want but it is still a choice. But, when we make excuses instead of choices….then we are just opening doors to failure. Choose even if you make a mistake.
Remember that life is not a dress rehearsal. This is the real thing and there are no retakes. Before saying or doing something destructive…stop and ask yourself if it is worth it. For every word and every action there is a consequence.
“Write the bad things that are done to you in sand,
But, Write the good things that happen to you on a piece of marble.”
Write in sand so that it will soon blow or wash away. And Write the good thing in marble so that you will remember them forever.
Hope is something we all need to survive. Without hope, life becomes desolate. Hope comes in many forms. “Hope you have a good day” to “Hope that this or that happens” that we dream of. And hope is what makes us try again and again.
image from life‑hope‑quotes‑13.png
As long as we have breath, there is hope. As long as we are alive, there is always hope. We may get so down at times that we do not see it, but it is hope that will lift us up and make us go again. Sometimes it is people who give us that feeling of hope. Other times it is an event and sometimes it is just what we feel in our hearts that this can not be the end of our dream or desire.
I think we all have hopes and dreams. For me personally, I believe hopes and dreams have to do with honesty and ethics. This does not mean that good things do not come to bad people for they do. People lie, manipulate and steal to get what they want but in the end….they will be held accountable. And even sadder is that they will be the very ones saying “oh, those people are horrible” about people who lie, steal and manipulate….no moral compass. But, I believe that when we do things honestly and ethically, our dreams do see fruition. And not only that, we have a clean conscience. We do not have to look over our shoulders the rest of our lives wondering if someone is going to catch us.
Opening our hearts to dreaming, believing in hope and believing our dreams will come true makes our lives so much brighter. It opens our lives for many wonderful things and the biggest ones are joy and peace of mind. As long as we have breath…..we have hope.
One of the hardest things to do when dreaming is to have patience. I think this is why many people choose to take shortcuts and cheat the system. Sometimes dreams take time. Look at son and I. We started in 2004 and are here now and I can tell you that the wait was worth the dream. Sometimes, I think it is the Lord waiting on us to change and grow and learn how to love and live life.
Sometimes I grew weary on this journey and sometimes I felt ready to give up. But that little thing called hope lurks in my heart and will not let me. I knew that as long as I was breathing…that was hope I would get here and I feel that way about my dreams I have now. I believe that I will get to paint my fence in the back yard with the nature scene like I want. Yes, I will have to lay on the padded platform that son is making me so that I can do it. But I have hope that I will see it finished before I leave here.
It always makes me sad to hear people say “I have no hope” for as long as we are breathing, there is hope. It is only when we leave this world that the hope of what we want to do here ends. This is where Faith comes in. Faith and Hope go hand in hand. Without faith, we can do nothing either. If we did not have faith that we could walk, we would not attempt it. If we did not have faith that we could raise children, we would never have them. We hope for things and then we have faith that they will happen. But it comes in steps.
This is where my beliefs lie. If you have Faith, Hope and Charity, life will move forward with much joy. Hope for what we want…..Faith that it will be there….and Charity for others…what we give out comes back then fold. I believe and have seen that. Be it good or bad, honest or dishonest, moral or immoral, legal or illegal.
Take stock of today and keep your eyes going forward to the future. The past is something we can neither change nor go back to. We can make amends for the things from the past and try to do what is right for the present and Hope for the future.
This is why I believe in living like this is my last day on earth. I try to make sure that I have taken care of things so that I have as few regrets as possible. When you think about not being here anymore, it makes each breath, each word, each action, each thought…that much more important. And it makes each person that much more important. And it makes the desire of all that money can buy less and less important.
video by CountryChickV
- Old Dreams Resurrected (pureglory.net)
- When It Comes To Dreaming-Are You Safe or Are You Free? (workthedream.wordpress.com)
- “Now faith is being sure… (knapsackofhope.wordpress.com)
- Breathe (dotunsblog.wordpress.com)
- Go For It (myjournalofpraise.me)
- I dreamed of Dolphins (ireport.cnn.com)
- Stand On His Promises (annettejaco.wordpress.com)
- Finding My Dreams In A Song (lifewithsarcoidosis.com)
- Never Give Up (workthedream.wordpress.com)
- hope. (soheregoesmylife.wordpress.com)
- The Dawn of Hope (freeatlastww.wordpress.com)
- And It’ll Only Get Better (amanisamanisaman.com)
- Phoenix Rising (freeatlastww.wordpress.com)
- The Need for Hope (aninspiredapproach.com)
Our senses are deluged daily and become so over saturated that it numbs them or deadens them I think. We lose the ability to enjoy the things our senses give us with the rushing world today. I love early morning and even middle of the night times for it makes my senses come alive.
I find myself hearing all the sounds of the house…the oxygen machine running, the fans, Jack snoring, the wind blowing, the clock in the living room chiming that I usually never hear, even the click of my own clock as the minutes change. And I start to notice the house with only my night lights on and lay here and look around seeing our home through a different lens. Even smells are stronger laying there in the semi dark. I smell the lotion I put on before I went to bed, the clean smell of my pillow cases, the lingering smell of the peach dessert son made and even the smells of the candles across the room.
With all the sounds blaring at us, the bright and rushing colors and life itself, with one smell after the other and even all the foods we taste in a day…everything becomes blurred. I read once that the first bite of anything was the best bite. After that as your senses became accustomed to it, the taste dimmed. Perhaps that is what life is. The first bite, the first jump into life with both feet is the most exciting and after that we spend our time trying to regain that excitement.
Try some time going outside after dark and sitting there in the sundown dimness and see how many things you hear that you do not normally pay attention to or how many things you smell or see. Allow your senses to come alive to the world around you. It is those senses that allow me to visualize when pain is bad so that I can escape the pain for a while.
Beautiful windy day outside today. Hope you are all having a great holiday weekend.
video by JuliaGreeneyed
“Rise In Disability Claims Began With Unemployment Benefits Running Out”
I was laying here reading the news around the world and this was the heading on a couple of news articles. The articles also said that the highest rise is in the age group 46 and up. They talk about the people can not find jobs (and my heart goes out ot them) and then of course those ones who will not take a job and especially those whose unemployment benefits run out and so they apply for disability. And all I could do was sit here with my mouth open.
I understand the unemployed person’s dilemma but to commit fraud is not the answer. I guess my faith makes me feel even stronger about this and the fact that I am disabled and have been for years. I do not want to meet my maker and have to answer why I committed fraud. Nor do I want my name plastered in the news as having been convicted or charged with committing disability fraud. There has to be another way than deceiving and lying to a program designed for the disabled and chronically ill and critically ill people.
“though highly motivated applicants in many cases will eventually succeed in obtaining benefits, particularly because of the 1984 liberalization of the criteria for pain and mental illness…….the SSDI disability determination system is badly in need of modernization“
This just blows me away. I truly believe that if someone is truly disabled, they deserve disability. But to use it for a stop-gap because they can not or will not get out and find a job is wrong. It is stealing money from the program and could cause others who truly are disabled to lose their chance at getting on disability.
“2.2 Million Go On Disability Since Mid-2010; Fraud Explains Falling Unemployment Rate; Will Higher Disability Taxes Fix the Problem?“
The article here:
talks about solutions and the huge increase in disability claims and the money in the program. Higher disability taxes will cause companies to just get rid of those disabled or obese or in poor health and hire the younger, healthier person. It also talks about how the high number going on disability has created a false view of unemployment because those that got approved for disability are not counted in the unemployment anymore and so that makes the unemployment rate look better than it is. This affects the taxpayers too for you are helping fund this program with the taxes you pay.
So, they are contemplating higher disability taxes to fix the problem? Why not stop the fraud instead of making Americans pay for the deceit of others? I used to wonder how people could lie and manipulate the system and still live with their conscience and then I realized it is because they have no conscience. I had someone say about their newly acquired disability that as soon as they got a job, they would get off disability and I thought to myself…this is not stop-gap insurance for those who do not have a job or will not get a job. It is for those that are truly disabled.
I often wonder where they think all the money comes from that goes to the disabled. Yes, part comes from what we pay in. A small part considering how much is paid out in disability. For every action there is a consequence and all those claiming disability that are not truly disabled are creating consequences that will affect the truly disabled people in the long run. And will drastically affect those committing fraud when caught.
I am glad to see that the disability fraud department is working so hard to catch these cases and people are getting caught daily. But, I am deeply saddened that the moral conscience has decayed to the point that people will take money from a system designed to help those that are disabled and can not take care of themselves.
I was glad to see that besides investigating the people filing claims, they also have looked at judges who are too lenient and approving the majority of the disability claims in their jurisdiction. Below is taken from the Washington Post:
“Some administrative law judges have come under scrutiny in recent years for appearing to be too lenient. The Wall Street Journal reported last year on one judge in West Virginia who approved 99.7 percent of his disability claims cases, while the national average is about 60 percent. That judge, David B. Daugherty, resigned soon after the article appeared.”
It is taxpayers who are footing the bill for fraud and for the lax judges that allow the fraud. The system needs a complete overhaul and many states are starting to do that. They are making people have to go through the process again and I think that is great. And many more cases are being reported and are showing up in the news daily. And they are finding more cases on the internet on sites like Facebook, where people are posting their lives on there. One case, the person claimed they could barely walk and were seen in pictures on their Facebook sliding down a slide at a fun water park. I say when people put their lives out there and use the internet to gain sympathy and tug at the hearts of those on the internet to get money when they are not really in that bad a shape deserve to be caught. The sad thing is deceit and fraud are hardening many people’s hearts and they do not want to help others anymore. I have noticed that the people who use emotional manipulation to get money from people they have never met in person on the internet are the same ones that will manipulate the disability system to get a disability check. The moral fiber is gone.
And I hope that they find a solution to those that are turning to disability because their unemployment ran out or they just do not want to work and the fraud department can find a way to stop this. I feel bad for people who truly can not find a job but the disability department is for those disabled not those unemployed. Perhaps they need a new program for the unemployed so that the frauds do not keep draining the system for the old one seems to foster fraud.
Just a few cases around the country:
Independence man indicted in Social Security fraud case http://www.examiner.net/news/x1120192070/Independence-man-indicted-in-Social-Security-fraud-case
- Crackdown needed on welfare, disability fraud (thesudburystar.com)
- Americans Collecting Disability Spikes, While Labor Force Participation Sinks – That Reeks Of Fraud (businessinsider.com)
- Illinois Cracking Down on Disabled Parking Abuse (stlouis.cbslocal.com)
- Let them eat cake! 500,000 Britons to lose disability benefits (sott.net)
- 500,000 to lose disability benefit (oyiabrown.com)
- Unemployment Insurance and Disability Applications (marginalrevolution.com)
Life is full of mountains to climb. No one said it would be easy but the most important thing to remember is that we must never ever give up. We may not win the race, but we must make ourselves finish the race…for then we have succeeded.
I am a fighter and I do not believe in giving up. Do not misunderstand. There are times when I want to lay my head down and just quit but there is something inside me that will not let me. Perhaps I am just hard-headed but I do know this. Inside all of us is a warrior that emerges when things are the toughest. I had someone tell me once that their reason for not fighting was they were not as strong as me. My response was “that is bull”. It is an easy cop-out to say that. We must face our own foes…no one can do it for us. We can either live our lives letting others take care of us and living off of others or we can be the fighter that is in all of us and fight our own battles no matter what is our handicap or disability.
video by drkaruturi
I have been knocked down many times and some of those times I wanted to stay down but pure grit made me pull myself back up and say “oh no, you are not beating me” and I kept pushing. And I will cross the finish line. It may be like the day I walked for my friends in the Cancer walk back east. My friend had died of cancer and so had her brother and I had promised them I would walk and release balloons for them. And I did ….on these crutches. It was not an easy walk. My other son and grandbaby walked with me when she was between two and three years old. She was swinging her little arms telling me “ou can do it Mimi” as we walked around that track. I was pushing so hard to do it when I felt her little hand on my crutch and felt my son on the other side. And when the track walk became so hard that I was not sure I would make it, I felt my son’s hand in the small of my back…gently pushing. If you are not going to help someone keep going, then get out of the way and let them go. My son and my sweetpea were helping me go to the finish line.That was the hardest physical thing I had ever done and the others walking the track were long gone and finished by the time I crossed the finish line but people in the stands were still cheering me on. Don’t ever give up.
video by sarathcroaky
I feel the same way about giving up on your dreams. As long as you have the dreams, you have hope that they will come true. But, if you give up on them….then the dream is over. When you fall and feel like staying down, force yourself back up one more time. If you fall 7 times …then get up 8 times. As long as you are pulling yourself up..physically and mentally then you have the chance to get that dream…to cross that finish line…to succeed at whatever it is you are trying to do.
video by whoisbrianbeckman
When life has you down, remember the words in this next video and plant them in your heart. It is all about attitude. Winners were not born. They are made from pure grit and determination. Believe in yourself and what you can do. Whatever you think you can or can not do…..you will be right. So believe you CAN and never ever give up.
video by roseinblu
- Comfort foods
- Dreams for the future
- Eating Out
- Etta James
- Female Impersonators
- heart center
- helping others
- Native American
- New Year's Resolution
- Protection from fraud
- Rocky Mountains
- US Military