I Wonder…..

Do people stop and think before they say things and when they are talking ugly about children especially…with disabilities or deformities ….that they are talking about someone’s child. They are talking about a child that the parents love dearly in spite of the deformities. They are talking about a child that could have been any of us.

I remember when Juliana Wetmore was born. Her birth hit the news…the child born with no face. She was the worst case of Treacher Collins Syndrome ever. She had no face at all. And yet her parents took this baby from day one and loved her and told her how beautiful she was and they never stopped to even think maybe she should not have been born…..not once. And yet people are so cruel as to suggest that this child whose only “fault” lies in the fact she was born with no face should have been terminated before birth.

The parents and surgeons have done everything possible to help make her face more normal. She has had surgery after surgery and this child is one resilient child. She is just like every other child inside. She wears a ballerina suit and dances, she goes to ball games, she goes to school and nothing seems to stop her. I so admire her parents. They have tried to be the best parents possible for her and to let her know just how loved she is.

So, why is it then that some people must make such ugly comments?  Why is it people can not change their mental image and see that this is a child just like your child and mine. The only difference is…she was born with no face.  She is growing up and they are still doing surgery on her and she is a happy child…thanks to some unbelievable parents. I can not imagine what this child has endured to have her face worked on and yet look at her…happy and a child.  Isn’t it amazing how much more accepting children are than adults. They have put balloons in to stretch her skin so that they could make her jaws. She has worn these horrible looking metal braces on her face and jaw and yet…she goes on being a child who plays with toys and friends and who laughs and just lives her life as a child.

So, I wonder…do the people who point and stare…who make ugly comments…or who say she should have been aborted and other comments…do they even stop to think that they are talking about someone’s child…a child who is loved dearly?   Would they want someone to talk about their child like that. And I have to wonder…how can they not see the beauty in this child with all she has endured and she is still smiling and happy? Her beauty just radiates from the inside out.

We are a world obsessed with outer beauty and yet most people fail to see the inner beauty. I look at this child and I see her strength, her love, her child like joy and her determination. I see such a beautiful child.  Many children would have suffered drastically from the way others react but her parents and family have made sure to counter that with all the love they can give.

The world focuses on looking young, on having Botox and plastic surgery, on trying to retain your youth and yet how much work do most people do on making their inner being beautiful?  How much money do they spend on learning how to be a person of character, virtue, integrity, honesty, love, compassion, etc?

The following is a video about Juliana. It is graphic for it shows her from birth on up. They are doing wonders to create a face for her and she has come a long way. And she has a way to go. But whether her face is operated on anymore or not….to me…this child is beautiful and has taught me much about acceptance and about what is important in life.

video by izzybella50

and one more:

video by tipookhan

When I look at all this and see the ugly comments, it reminds me of not too long ago of the hateful person who asked me since I was so sick had I ever considered euthanasia.  My reply to her was “no, not once and evidentally my life was a lot happier than hers in spite of my health for that thought has never entered my  mind and it has hers.”  And I say…happiness is within us. It is not in what we own, who we are with, what we look like…it is in our hearts and Juliana Wetmore is the best example of that I have ever seen.

Zoom In On That Inner Glow

I love taking pictures. It is a hobby of mine. Have you ever noticed that with a camera you zoom in on what you want in the picture…on what you like and when you edit you try to cut out what was bad or what you did not like or want in the picture. And when you do not like the picture, you just take another one. Life is kind of like that. We can zoom in on things. The most important thing is to zoom in on the good things…the important things. If things are bad, change your focus and find something good.

uncomfortablesoul.com

Sometimes we can get so focused on the negative that we fail to see the good things in the overall picture. I think that this is when we forget that we control things and we control how we react. Sometimes we can get caught up in things and not realize that all we have to do is say no or leave. I have learned that it is not really as hard as I thought it would be to tell someone that I did not want to do this or that. And I found it easier than I thought to leave an event or place where I felt really uncomfortable. I think being sick made me realize that my moments are few and I do not want to waste them on things that I am not enjoying or do not like.

I have heard people say all the time how they wish things would just go calmly for a change. Reality is…this is life. There are no dress rehearsals and it is what it is.  Life may never calm down and go smoothly and so it is important to learn to live peacefully within the storm. Find that inner place of peace so that the storms can swirl around you but not ruin your day.

image from ripplemaker.hubpages.com

Have you ever noticed how resilient children are? They do not dwell on sad things or hold anger like adults do. It is only when we get older that we seem to hold on to emotional things instead of letting them go. To, me this says we are born with a glow inside us, a forgiving nature and an optimistic view of life. And this light inside us when we are little is what makes us endure all the things we do.

Some people have lost their light or it has dimmed so much that they can not see joy in the world or in life anymore and it shows on their faces with sadness and bitterness etched deep in their faces. Those that manage to keep their inner light glowing can be seen from a distance for the light reflects in all they do and say. It shows that their soul is in harmony with the outside of them just like the bright joyousness children have. Oh how we love to sit and watch them.

image from idlehearts.com

So, what do we do to revive our inner glow or to keep it burning brighter?  I think we have to learn to let go of things. Emotional things are like carrying loaded suitcases around with us all the time. They make us tired..exhausted…weary and serve no purpose. Holding on to anger, hatred, sadness and other negative emotions only keeps us feeling those emotions. I guess because of being so sick, I find that I can not keep those emotions in my life and find hatred to be a very waste of time.  Emotions that are negative come to an end and it is up to us to end them and let go of them. Even grieving must have an ending. I have lost loved ones but I can not walk around every day crying about them. I have to work through the loss and reach the point of accepting that they are gone. So, it is up to us to light our inner fire and to keep it burning. What are you carrying around that you have not let go of in a long time? Is it affecting the joy in your life?

image from catherinedextrase.wordpress.com