Rhetorical-Talking To Myself

I am laying here watching “True Women” about the ancestors of many of us and the hardships they endured to just survive life. They endured wars, famine, diseases like cholera, childbirth out in the rough, loss of children, spouses, homes, hate, wars and yet something kept them going. And again, I look to that word “Hope” ….hope that things will be better. The same thing many, many years later that I and others hold on to in order to survive hard times.

image from http://www.facebook.com/pages/A-Spouses-Story-PTSD/195448267154305

How do we get the drive back in our country? How do people get their drive back? I hear people say “why bother” when it comes to getting a job or trying to get a home. We may be hurt, hurting, sick, ill but that does not mean we are broken and beyond hope…beyond fixing.  Hopelessness is a feeling that destroys and the only way to fight it is to keep the hope in our hearts. …hope that things will be better, hope that we can make it through whatever we are battling. Hope…such a small word that means and does so much.

As I watch this show, I started wondering have we become so pampered that we do not really know what hard times are? It has only been in the past ten years that son and I really started looking at the way the world is going and started living a simpler life and going back to older ways to survive. And I wonder, could I have survived back then. A friend tells me yes I would…that I have the grit that those men and women had back then. I hope so.

Maybe it is finally realizing some years back that the most important things in life were not a fancy home, name brand clothes, fine china, the newest vehicle, etc but rather were the more simple things such as loved ones…family, family of choice, friends, time spent together, simple food, a home that is filled with love  not expensive things that will not bring me joy. It is those I love close to me that brings me joy.

Maybe that is the difference in today and years ago. Maybe that is what made some of those men and women so strong. They were focusing on the important things…owning a home, having a family, and loving each other and today’s world has become focused on the material things and accumulation of wealth. This is not to say that some back then did not try to accumulate on the backs of others because they did and eventually fell. But, it seems those that had such joy were the ones that valued love and people more and things less. The brand Niki did not mean anything or other fancy name brands but working together side by side for the good of  family and loved ones did.

Maybe the pain and meds have my brain rattling. I am not sure. But as I watch this show, I realize that yes, I could have made it back then. I am strong in spirit. I am adaptable. So are my sons. We have learned to make do with what we have, to not spend on needless things, to not over extend ourselves financially, and to value time spent together. That leaves me more energy to focus on fighting all this medical.

Would I want to have lived back then? In some ways…yes, but in most ways…no. What I do want is to have that inner strength, to have those dreams of life that include family and being together and sharing and to keep dreaming of the future. I want to know in my heart that if something fails, that we pick up and start again and it will be alright. It is not the end of the world for it is only things. As long as the family and loved ones are still together, then all is right in my world.

I want to see our country get back to what those people saw back then…a country of hope and dreams, a country where you still had a chance to work for your dreams, a country where people worked together for the country not fought within the ranks, a country of opportunities.  Hope….has our country lost it?

And I will quit rambling now as I am tired and my brain is frazzled and finish watching my show.