Who Comes First?
In this world where women are often treated as second best, not valued as they should be, overworked between work and home/family life and just in general are made to feel guilty if they do anything for themselves, they list themselves on the bottom of the list of who is important. I am talking in people…not God here. I did this for years and years and wondered why everyone else treated me like I was the least important. And then someone very wise opened my eyes and taught me a very good lesson.
“We teach people how to treat us by what we will accept.”
This means that if we put ourselves last on the list, then so will others. We have taught them that we are not worth putting on the top of the list. We lower our bar so much because we feel the demands of life on us and feel like if we take time for us, buy for ourselves, do something special for ourselves then we are being bad and selfish. And people pick up on it.
image from www.reinventlove.com
Another very wise person taught me that we as women especially tend to be “helper” type people and we want to help others and lift them up. I am that way. I try to do it with my blog or by doing things I see others need. But, this friend told me one day that if I did not put my oxygen on first, then I would be no help to anyone. I had to think on that a while and I realized what she was saying was that if I did not take care of myself, did not do for me the things I need to be healthy and filled with joy, to feel beautiful and assured…..then I could not do anything to help anyone else.
So, who comes first? You do. This does not mean that all your time should be spent on yourself, indulging yourself, spoiling yourself….it means that before you can help others you must start with yourself. Remember how I talk about choices? It is a choice to make sure that you are top of your list that you start with for when you are, then you can help lift others up in their lives. When we do not take care of ourselves, when we do not feel like we look good, when we are not eating right or exercising right, when we are not attending to our own spiritual and emotional needs….it shows. And people around us will view us that way.
image from cougarcrossings.com
Start your day putting yourself first and once you get yourself taken care of then you can take care of those around you. You are worth it. You deserve it and it is not selfish to attend to your needs. Like I said…if you spent all day every day just on yourself…that would be selfish. But, if you take care of yourself daily, you will find you have so much more energy to help those around you and you will show others that you are worth loving and worth being treated as special as you are.
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