Do Not Just Survive Life…Live It
I hear people attribute the word survivor to me a lot. The truth is, I want to do more than survive life. I want to L I V E life. I want to taste it, experience it, touch it, breathe it and see it. And that is what I try to do within the framework of what I can do. I physically can not fly around the world, hike the Alps, walk the streets of Rome or anything else like that. But thanks to technology, I CAN still experience the world.
My computer is my window to the world. It brings friends into my room to talk to me while I am laying here in the infamous jelly bed. (My hospital bed with the fancy gel mattress) It takes me places that I can not go physically such as to France to walk up and down the streets or to Africa to see all the animals. I can watch videos on just about anything I want on You-tube and some things I do not want to watch. I can open a book and go anywhere, be anyone I want and learn about all sorts of things.
I think I have been blessed with this extra sense that allows me to not see myself as disabled or chronically ill and allows me to look at life in a different perspective than many people. I awaken no matter how bad I feel with anticipation of what the day will bring. I do not want to sit around and talk symptoms and how bad I feel all day. I want to live my life. That is why I am going through RA treatment and taking not one but two treatment meds at the same time. I want to be able to sit up easier and be in my chair where I can explore my patio and look at flowers or hummingbirds. And that is why this shuttle bus is so important to us. It will help make it easier for me to go to all these doctors and help make it easier for my son who has health issues and back trouble.
Monday we had to make a trip to Denver for medical things for me. A trip up and a trip back in one day plus the test and it has taken me until today to be able to feel like I was up to writing a blog. My legs and feet were swollen twice their size from being in the mini van with my legs down, my pain was out of control and the exhaustion was so bad that all I have done is sleep when I was not awake in pain. I did not come on here Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday because I did not want to write depressing posts about how bad I was feeling. So, I waited until I was feeling some better and could smile and talk to you all.
I always cringe when I see people spending all day complaining, whining, fussing, ranting, etc about their lives or what is going on around them. When we do that we waste precious moments that we can never get back. And when you are my age, you do not want to waste any minute. You do not want anything to take you away from what is important and that to me is my son here, my other son and his wife, my Sweetpea, my Daisy, my family, my family of choice and my dear friends.
I say this with all seriousness. Do not ever quit dreaming. You never know what may come true. We dreamed of Colorado and people told us we would never get here and I was too sick to come this far. Took up over a year but we finally got things arranged so that we could move here. Son always wanted to publish a book and took him years but he published his first. I dreamed of going to Italy and I finally got to go a few years ago. And I still dream of returning and the dreaming sustains me in times of critical pain.
Do not let anyone destroy your dreams. We have some trying to destroy our dream of getting the shuttle bus but we are not going to let it stop us. Never let anyone take your dreams from you. Dreams are important and they give us hope and something to look towards. Remember me writing about “leveling”? Well, people who try to destroy another’s dreams are the kind of “levelers” that pull people down to where they are. They are not happy people and want you to feel as miserable as they do. Be around the people who level you up and pull you up to happiness and to love and be a person that levels up not pulls down. It makes the world a much better place to be.
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