Keep Your Light Shining
There is a light shining out of all of us. In some of us it is stronger than others because we work to keep that light shining. That light is our happiness, our joy, our passion, our love, our compassion, our drive, etc. But, have you ever noticed how some people can drain all of that out of you in just a very short time? People who insist on being negative about everything, who are angry, resentful and moan and groan all the time about how bad life is are usually the ones that hit me the most. But, I have learned not to let people do that to me. It is my life and I have to be in charge of it.
I am sure by now some of you are thinking…well, how do I stop them from doing that. Without realizing it, we train people on what we will and will not accept in our lives. If we stand there listening to their moaning and groaning about everything in life, then they assume we like to hear it. And one of the first signs that we need to put some distance between us and them is when we are mentally thinking “My gosh I wish they would shut up!” or we go home thinking “I am so glad to be home and do not have to listen to so and so again”.
When I run into people that give off the depressing, angry, negative aura coming from them, I move away from them. If I can not do it physically, I do it mentally by focusing my attention elsewhere. I have learned that nothing you say to these people is going to make them see the brighter side of life. They like too much being the way they are. And if you are not careful they will extinguish your light.
When I am struggling with my health, pain, finances, etc…I need all my energies to do that and if someone is an emotional vampire as I call it, they will drain me dry and leave nothing left for me to work with. Some people are deliberately that way and some do it and have no idea what a downer they are. It really does not matter the reason because the truth of the matter is….if it is pulling you down ..or me…then we need to vacate the premises and put ourselves in a more positive place.
I am chronically ill and disabled and occasionally I will tell about what I go through but I try hard to not have it as a mantra. I try to discuss it and not whine about it or magnify it so that people feel sorry for me. Being a victim can be addicting because the fix is all the loving comments and attention people show. No one, and that includes those of us that are sick and try to still keep up a positive outlook on life, likes to be around someone who never sees anything good in life. I believe what we let into our brains affects how we look at life. This is why I do not watch reality television because I think all the stupid games, jealousy, fighting, name calling, anger and hate are things that only pull me down emotionally and mentally and I do not want that.
Sometimes people are afraid to let their light shine, to act as happy as they are or be as positive as they are because they are afraid those that they are around will make fun of them or will judge them as nothing is wrong when they are sick or going through a crisis. I say let your light shine because you may be lifting someone else up from the murky waters of despair. Do not let anyone or anything dim your light and your passion for life. It is your choice and for me…I choose to vacate the premises so to speak and the announcer can say “And Deb has left the building” when the negative Nellies and moaners and groaners show up.
I have had people tell me that they could not back off from certain people because they felt responsible for making them happy. My mother was one of those that felt like we should all entertain her and make her happy. And we all tried and she was never happy even with that. The reason is….WE are responsible for creating our own happiness inside. Happiness is an inside job…not what we get from the outside. And so, since you can not make another person happy then it is ok to put some space between you and them when they are so negative. You can bring them joy and laughter, but happiness is up to them. If you do not take care of you first, you are of no use to anyone else. It is like that saying..when the plane is crashing..put your OWN oxygen on first….then you can help others.
So, let your light shine. Let nothing dim it. Let it shine…let it shine…let it shine…all over everyone for you may energize another person’s light that has dimmed.
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