You all have heard me say that victims only talk about all the things wrong and all the problems. Survivors know the things wrong and they look for solutions to help make things better. So, my question today as I look around the internet and I see massive amounts of media posting the most ugly, negative post you can about cops, about politicians, about people in general is where are the warriors?
I can tell you a few of them for I see them. There are Black cops who are trying to reach the ones that are hating, fighting and creating more problems and help calm the storm. Nothing good comes from such agitation. There are other people out there of all races who are striving to calm the storm so that we can all listen and come to conclusions. There are cops all over who are trying to help those that are in such need and trying to show the love and compassion we want from our law enforcement. There are teachers who are taking training trying to understand better how to have discussion on this to find solutions to bring unity to us all.
And then I see those that want to argue on every positive post and make comments that are negative or to try to prove their point that either this side or that side is bad. We do not need to prove. We need to find solutions to help everyone be the person they can be to the fullest. How is it helping the situation for White people who think they are “helping” to keep posting stories about how this cop or that cop was evil or did something bad? Why not post things that are positive that people are trying to do to heal the broken trust, to do good and to make the relationship better on both sides?
I watched as angry White people threw in the face of angry Black people how their own people sold them as slaves. I just felt my jaw drop and I had to write on that thread…”So, your point is what? That because some Blacks in Africa sold their own for money then it is alright? Wrong is wrong people. And slavery was wrong. I am so ashamed our country did that and that any country does it.But the wrong does have ramifications.
And then I heard angry Black people throw in the faces of angry White people how all Cops and all White people are nothing but killers and racists. Seriously folks, how is this helping? All Whites are not racist and killers and all Blacks are not thugs and criminals. Can we stop the blame game and move on to the healing that needs to be done. Are there bad Cops? Yes. Are there Black people who have done bad things? Yes, just as there are of any race. We acknowledge that so can we now work on solutions? That means people of each race trying to calm their own so that people can talk and can learn and not be so filled with hate at each other.
Just a thought….we do not have to tell all the bad stories about Cops or White people to solve the problems. Now do we have to tell all the bad stories about blacks who committed crimes or did this or that. We need warrior attitude which is find solutions for the problems and promote the positive that IS going on with both sides. Remember my saying….Victims focus on all the things wrong and that is all they talk about. Survivors know the things wrong and they focus and talk about ways to make things better. All Whites are not racist nor haters and all Blacks are not thugs and criminals. Only a small portion of our country is that way. Those of us that want to change things are tired of the media and of people presenting everything they “heard” that is bad about Whites or about Blacks. We can not have any form of healing if all we do is focus on the problems and never work on solutions. Negativity, hatred and racism just produce more negativity, hatred and racism.
How about we produce positive things going on like the boy I posted about who was living in a tent so he could go to college because he wanted to make his life better and the cops helped him. That was a two-way street. This young man was polite, he did not fight, he did not argue and the cops actually sat down and listened to what was going on and found a way to help him. Now that my friends is promoting unity in our country.
Maybe if you are one of those so angry from either side, the next time you feel like spewing hater or telling the world once again all the bad things Cops did or all the bad things Blacks did or all the bad things White people did, you take a time out. Go sit down somewhere and think about the good things any of these people have done and write them down. Look for the good and you will find it and promote the good. We can not always control what happens to us in life but we CAN control how we react to it. If we only think about the bad things and we only look for bad things, that is all we will see. Like a camera, maybe we should change our focus and turn our lens to the good things.
This poem is one of my favorites. It was written about children but I think it applies to adults too. It is called “Children Learn What They Live”. As you read it, I want to ask you to read it in the context of what have you been teaching people about themselves? Have we been teaching people to hate or to fear or to think they are no good? Just think about it as you read this and only you can answer that within your heart. It has made me more conscious of what I say to others for this is no dress rehearsal. We get one chance in this world and I want my chance to be one where I uplift others and love others.
Children Learn What They Live
By Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D.
If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.
If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.
If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.
If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.
If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.
If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.
If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.
If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.
If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.
If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.
If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.
If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.
If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.
If children live with fairness, they learn justice.
If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.
If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.
If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.
Copyright © 1972 by Dorothy Law Nolte
Video of the boy who rode his brother’s bike six miles and was sleeping in a tent so that he could enter college and what happened. Awesome story: http://www.wsbtv.com/news/local/homeless-teen-bikes-6-hours-to-get-to-college-sleeps-in-tent/401160413?ea2CcF