Middle of the Night Ramblings

Woke up to banging on the house. Son checked and we are in a fast-moving, high wind storm…may or may not bring snow and he had to go out and snag the trashcan flying around and other items. And now, here I lay wide awake and my mind on many things. The dark with the Christmas lights glowing makes for good thinking time. Maybe that is what is wrong with politicians…they never have good thinking time.

One of the things that is laying with me is accountability. Sadly, if we let our politicians lead us …there is none, but the truth is personal accountability is in the minority. People do not want to take responsibility for what they say and do. They rant, spout off ugly, attack others, make comments that lead others down a destructive path, hurt others …etc…and then blame it on the other person. I am not perfect by any means but I am quick to take accountability for what I say or do. If I hurt, I apologize. If I wrong, I try to make right and whatever I do…I OWN it. It is mine no matter whom I choose to blame. And the accountability will come now or in the end. It is our choice. I just simply prefer now.

And I do not take to videos, posts on the internet to try to get people to join my side and twist it to look like I was right and others were wrong. We can always get people to agree with us….but it does not make us right. Just try it sometime and post how somebody did such and such to you and cry and rant and see how many people will come and say “Yes, you are so right”. They may not really believe it but feel compelled to say so because they are your friend. It is called trying to get the sympathy vote. I can guarantee you that if I post that someone called me ugly, lazy, fat, mean..whatever..on my Facebook that friends on there would come and tell me how awful and that I was not lazy, fat, mean, dumb. And they do it because they believe I was upset and wanted to make me feel better….not because what the other person said was not true but just because I pulled the sympathy card and tried to get people to feel sorry for me and agree with me. I have seen it over and over…such high school behavior.

Ok, next on the list is reluctant role models….we are all a role model and if we deceive ourselves on that like good ole Miley Cyrus is doing and others, we will come back to the paragraph above… accountability. When we behave in a way that leads others down the wrong path, we are accountable. One day people will wake up and go WTH???  Why did I act like that?  And yet, it is out there. Everything we say and do on the internet…ends up on Google… you tube, facebook..and will follow us the rest of our lives and people will see. So that means ten years, twenty years, even after we die…we are still pulling people down with what we posted in haste or anger or emotion.. That rant that was so important to try to garner public support for bad behavior…will haunt you the rest of your life. Scary thought is it not. Well..being a person of faith, I remember a quote somewhere that said we are responsible (accountable) for every word that comes out of our mouths…we just did not realize with high-tech that it could affect generations down the road. And that was a lesson that I got taught over and over until one day I looked up and said “I get it Lord”.

Faith…I tell people all the time I am not a “religious” person. I am a person of faith..between me and God. And I have a choice. I can let religion cause me to behave in such a way that I lead people away from Christ because I hate religion or I can let my faith be something that makes people look at me and say “I want what she has”.  It has not always been faith for me and after seeing churches be nothing but man-made rules and ideas, I pulled away for a while. And then one day I realized I could either make church what I want it to be or I could abandon it which really was sad to me. And so, I started going to church bringing what I…ME….I wanted in church. I can not account for anyone else and what they are doing in church..only myself. And so, I look for ways to live my faith, to find in church things to enrich my faith and to not use “religion” as an excuse to push myself and/or people away from church or faith. It is one of those choice things again. I do not agree with all going on in my little church so the choice was leave or work to make it a better place for ME. I cannot make it a better place for you or anyone else…only me and my faith. I have to be accountable to my faith and not let any harsh feelings I may have turn me or someone else away from God.

I look around the world and see so much venom, anger and hatred and think “how can people live like that?” and then I realize that how they live like that is living in misery. They are so miserable that they want to bring others down to where they are; that old “leveling” thing. We pull people up to where we are or drag them down to where we are…so that we feel on an even level. The thing about leveling folks is we have to take personal accountability and NOT let anyone pull us down. It is so easy to blame someone else or something else for our unhappiness when the truth is…happiness is a choice….a choice to be happy no matter what is going on. So, when someone tries the “leveling” down on us…we either walk away from it or we let them pull us down but no matter the choice…OWN it. That is what accountability is; owning what you say and do.

And now that I have solved the world’s problems…*laughing here*….and the wind has not let up, I think I will put on a movie and try to unwind. I think in about thirty minutes the coffee pot comes on.  Son and Daisy went back to bed after rescuing the stuff outside in the wind. I think half of our shingles blew off or it sounded like it. But the good news is, the roof is still there. 🙂

And let me add this….this blog was written because of reading about Miley Cyrus and seeing a video of hers. Someone will say “Oh she is writing about me”. Well, the answer is “No, I was not but if this it hitting a jerk response in you ask yourself what it is triggering for it is not me triggering but something inside” for this blog is not about anyone I know personally though I am sure many, including myself could take this personally.