Turned out to be a longer sabbatical than I thought it would be but a much-needed one. Things are still rough as my spine is not fixed yet, I am being sent to a vascular doctor for my feet and lower legs and just had endoscopy which showed up one large ulcer and three smaller (not small…just smaller) ulcers in my stomach. I go back in six weeks for a repeat to see if the meds are helping.
I have wanted to write on this topic for a while. It seems the world wants to keep dividing instead of multiplying or uniting like we should. We pass around more labels than ever before and labels belong on soup cans. And I look at the destruction that has been done to my country over the past months and think with such sadness of how we all came together after 9/11 to join forces: No division and no fighting just bringing unity. I pray it does not take that again for us to wake up.
So, what has laid on my mind and heart is this. Every time we pass on a picture of ugliness, or racism, of killing, of extreme negativity we are helping keep it alive. Did you ever think about that. We think we are helping but all we are doing is reminding people of things that keep people divided. There is just so much craziness that if I did not have the complete faith in God, my Father, in Christ, my savior, I might succumb to the fear so many have. I just know that God takes care of his own. And I also know that when people are in a state of fear or anger, they do not think rationally. I truly believe that we need to have better investigation of these crimes and I believe the media needs to quit feeding info to keep people stirred up.
I have never constantly pushed my health issues in the front for everyone to see. Why? Because I don’t want pity, I don’t want attention, I just want to serve the Lord and if it means doing it hurting then so be it. I believe Satan keeps throwing these things at me so I will stop working for the Lord but I will not stop. And I know when I can not go a step further, God is carrying me.
So, lets talk about unity. We can not have unity if all we do is use labels. Labels divide and make distinctions between us. When we label others or ourselves, we are drawing a line saying they are different from me. How can you unify if we are always putting labels on everything. I remember watching a Black man teaching his daughter who started school for the first time and he had her repeating things like….I am good, I am not bad, no one is better them me, I am kind, I am beautiful. I thought it was beautiful because he was trying to prepare her for the ugliness that can occur when we send our kids off to school. And where do these kids who yell out obscenities and name calling learn how to do this? Someone has TAUGHT them whether it be the parents, the grandparents, the siblings…someone close to the child has taught them to hate and name call.
This is my take on these riots. When they destroy property and hurt people, they cease being a rioter and become criminals. Some Blacks were out there trying to get people to stop fighting and to talk but they would not. They even tried to set a journalist on fire and the journalists said it was too dangerous to stay and cover the story now. When has it ever been that bad in our country before besides Ferguson and Baltimore and this case. How is this helping the situation? Or is the hate and name calling increasing the violence? I think adults should be able to discuss and I do not think any person, cop or not, in their right mind would be showing up with the intent to kill, not with the way the hate climate is right now. There will always be ugliness in the world, on the internet and we have to make a choice to NOT fall into their games to get us to react. I recently had a “self-proclaimed Christian” make disparaging and insulting remarks about me and because I have known this person for years and years and know what they are truly like, I just had to smile and go on my way. I could have let myself get drawn into the drama that they like to stir but I do not like games and I definitely do not like the drama. Life is full of choices and I don’t need flowery religious pictures and quotes to get my point across. Life is full of choices including being happy and we have to choose just like we have to choose to not get caught up in the hatred, racism, and games people like to play.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23
The Orlando shooting really has my head spinning. Have we totally lost our moral compass? Seems like all you read anymore in the news is shootings, murders, rapes, political corruption, and the list goes on. And all we see on the internet is arguing, ugliness, bullying and attacking….internet vigilantes. We have to be accountable for our own actions and I see so much inappropriate behavior that I wonder has the moral compass been lost.
My heart goes out to all those families with loved ones who were killed in this mass shooting and I send prayers to the survivors and the families. No one for any reason should be a victim of hate. I know many that “call” themselves Christian spew hate for various reasons but if they were truly following Christ, they would act like Christ who was about love, compassion and caring. But so many are so busy judging others that they evidently do not have time to study the Bible and see what it really says. Paul tells us we are not to judge others. Jesus exhibits that over and over. He told the Pharisees and Priests that brought the woman into Jesus wanting her stoned for committing adultery and Jesus reply was “He who is without sin throw the first stone” and they all left. So I ask people who have been victims of all this hate to know that not all of us who say we follow Christ hate others.
Now this shooting the man was said to have called the FBI and said it was an ISIS job. What more do we need? And yet it seems like some would rather do anything than say why this man did this. Overseas, they have targeted LGBT people and have killed them and beheaded them. If you never admit there is a problem, the problem can not be fixed. Banning guns will not fix it because it will not stop the criminals, the thugs, the mentally ill from acquiring some weapon. We have to start addressing the problem and start reigning in our own anger/hatred/etc. And we have to know the truth of what has happened and not get derailed into other areas. Yes, there are some who will try to tell is it is all of us that is the problem and it is not the hatred groups doing this. And again I say, if the truth is not told, if the real problem is not admitted then it will never be fixed. We can not let ourselves turn into the kind of person we do not like.
Don’t tell half-truths and expect trust when the full truth comes out. Half truths are no better than lies….
I wish the media would read this and understand it. When they manipulate the news, withhold news, do not tell the total truth, they are lying to us. Is is pitiful that we have to look at other country’s news stations or hunt independent ones to know what is really going on in our country. But, if you are a person that wants the truth and wants to know what our government is really doing, you will hunt for the truth.
We were created perfect. People did not come into this world hating. They learn it as they grow up. I remember working to make sure my sons did not have prejudice or racial hatred towards others no matter what their skin color was, where they came from, what sex they were or sexual orientation. That is not our job to judge that. Our job as Jesus told us is to love the Lord with all our hearts and all our souls and to love our neighbor (meaning all the other people in the world” as we love ourselves and if everyone did that, we would not have hatred. I come from the hippy generation where all we wanted was peace and I think that is why all this hatred and anger really bother me. And the young generation has learned a lot of anger and hatred and are ready to attack and scream for any reason. That saddens me. Why not take that energy albeit negative energy and turn it into something positive. Every thing that crosses our mind does not have to come out our mouths.
image from purehappylife.com
If you live your life with integrity, honesty and morals, then expect those around you to do the same. I grew up hearing that expression that “birds of a feather flock together” and it was not until I got older that I realized that another expression “we are known by the people we associate with” was saying the same thing. If we believe in integrity, honesty, ethics, love, compassion and kindness, then we should be hanging around with people who believe like we do. People with similar beliefs and likes tend to hang out together. Those that are big drinkers hang around those that are drinkers. Those that like to party hang around those that like to party. Those that are church goers hang around other church going people. And those that are filled with love and kindness and caring and integrity tend to hang around others that are the same. And those that like to play games, lie and deceive tend to hang around others that like to do that too. So, I believe we hang around or associate with those who have the same moral compass as we do. So, if you are starting to notice that your moral compass is off kilter, perhaps you need to start associating with a different group of people.
Pay attention to those around you and look for the fruits of the spirit which are love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith and when you find people who are the same you will find you have a much more joy filled and happy life. Look for those that are honest, ethical and have a sense of community about them. Just a hint is that if you get in a group of people who are always spewing hate, attacking others, putting others down, etc then you have stepped into the wrong group. And if you get in a group that is sweet and loving and caring but does all the hating and attacking, etc, you have fallen into a group whose moral compass has gone astray. Once you become aware, then you will recognize that some of the sugary sweet things they say really have a knife in the middle of the bouquet. Be accountable for yourself and your views in life and what you say to others for this is real life not a rehearsal. We do not get another chance.
image from https://quip.io/q/jl6q
This is something that has been weighing heavy on my heart and mind for about a year now. First to clarify something. What is a vigilante or vigilante justice? It is a person or a group of people who decide that justice was not done and decide to take it into their own hands to give the justice they think was deserved. They operate outside of the law. The Free Dictionary defines it as “A person who is not a member of law enforcement but who pursues and punishes persons suspected of lawbreaking.” And sometimes internet vigilantes just do not like a person and attack them.
I think my first inkling came when I was an avid bear lover and loved to watch them on the internet and sat in total shock when people on the internet became so enraged at a hunter who shot a bear legally and they wanted to literally hang him. One woman wrote she would pay someone to hang the hunter up by his male appendage and skin him alive. The comments ranged from giving out the private information of whom these people “THOUGHT” was the hunter. They did not know for sure but they were going after someone. It ranged from death threats to vulgar and nasty attacks on the person.There was a lot of horrible things written. And it seems to be getting worse.
Then last year we had the story of the Dentist who went to Africa and paid the guides to take him in and allow him to kill a lion. Again the vigilante justice started with death threats to this man and his family, harassing him, deciding it was their job to make his business close down. They did not give any thought to whether this man had children that depended on his income to survive. Nor did they give any thoughts to whether or not this man’s children or wife were reading what they said. It was if all of them were guilty and in fact they said if the wife did not leave the husband she was guilty of killing the lion. The literal frothing at the mouth and the desire to punish the perpetrator in such horrific ways just makes me sick at my stomach.
And as we move forward, we had the story of the 4-year-old child who fell into the zoo and one of the gorillas got him and drug him all over the water because all the people yelling and carrying on were agitating him. There have been cases of female gorilla’s protecting children that have fallen in but this time it was a male gorilla. The zoo brought in their team and they tried to figure out what to do without hurting either the child or the gorilla. But then it was decided that they could not shoot the gorilla with a dart with tranquilizer in it because he might become agitated before it set in and hurt the child.
So, the decision was made to kill the gorilla. I admit it broke my heart that they had to do this but then the internet vigilante force started in and they were calling the family, threatening the family of the child, and even said the child should have been shot and not the gorilla. I found myself gasping when I read that and all I could think was “What is wrong with you people?” The hate in these vigilante people is palpable. They released names and addresses, made threats, denigrated the people, researched them to find out anything about them they could to use in their attack. Their logic becomes skewed and nothing you say can make them stop and take a breath. They do not feel justice was served and so they are going to serve it themselves.
And now we move to the case of the Stanford student who sexually assaulted the woman and the judge gave him six months and he would be on the sexual offender’s registry for the rest of his life. And again the vigilante justice crew started up. They were screaming for the judge to lose his job, calling and threatening the family, the lawyer and anyone else they could think of. They were giving out the phone numbers and addresses of the judge, the lawyer and the boy and his parents. They wanted him put to death, they wanted him in jail for life, they wanted blood plain and simple. And they did not care how they got it.
Releasing phone numbers and addresses may cause someone to go to their homes and do the actual deed of killing him and his family or the judge and his family or the lawyer and his family. They also started attacking anyone who did not agree with them. What they did not think about was that this punishment actually destroyed the young man’s life forever. He will forever be on the sexual offender registry and have to register with them. And people do go check the sexual offender registry to see if a sex offender lives near them so he will never be able to escape it. He will never get a good job. He will not be allowed in colleges anywhere unless it is some off the wall college that can be bought. He has lost every thing. His reputation will follow him and he will never have that good high paying job, will never be the darling of the girls anymore, he will become a very isolated person. But, that was not enough for the virtual vigilantes. They wanted him dead but if not death wanted him thrown into the worst prison ever and brutally raped over and over. Being a person of faith, all I could think of was “Revenge is mine saith the Lord”.
See, I believe that if things do not seem fair, then you work to make the legal system change and work to change laws. People, do not take the law into your own hands, do not endanger whole families including the children because you are furious that the person did not get the sentence YOU thought they should have. Virtual vigilantes are going against the law which makes them no better than the ones they want to get revenge on. Vigilantes do not care if the person was within the law and did something. As far as they are concerned, if they think the person did something wrong, they want to force them to suffer for it.
The college student broke the law and was convicted. But the little boy falling into the gorilla cage did not break the law. The man shooting the lion did not break the law. The transgender bathroom issue was another one where such rage was spewing forth and wanting to hurt the transgender people who were not breaking the law. The hunter making a legal kill did not break the law but to the internet vigilantes, he broke their law of do not kill animals. Just pick up a newspaper or read an article online and then start reading the comments. Read political articles, or articles that are controversial. It is a daily thing now and while most seems to be on the internet, people are starting to do it face to face and yet people do not see it for what it is. I am a firm believer in that survivors focus on solutions and victim mentality people only focus on the problems. There is so much hate going on in the world now that it is beyond belief. We have a legal system for a reason and if it is not working like people want, then they should focus all that angst and anger and hatred on making the system better. Get out from behind the monitor or screen and do something productive for trying to ruin the lives of people you are angry at makes you just as guilty of wrong doing as the person you are attacking. Breaking the law yourself is not the way to go. One day I hope the law changes and there is consequences for this type of vigilante behavior. Yes, we have freedom of speech but with that comes consequences.
Another poem from my poetry book. My apologies that I have not been posting on the blog. We are in the middle of selling things to raise money to get another vehicle after our van transmission went out, one that I can get into easier than my son’s jeep. So, my brain is tired. 🙂 Some of you asked me how you could help. Please just buy the poetry book because that way you will get something in return instead of just donating.
The book can be bought here: https://workthedream.wordpress.com/2016/05/09/my-book-is-on-amazon/
THE LAST DANCE
With wisps of hair across her beautiful face
Tears on her cheeks your finger could trace
She stood there, head bowed in humble prayer
Feeling as if she were the only one to care
She closed her eyes and listened once more
To the music that always drew her to the door
The music suddenly rose in tempo and sound
She knew soon her time was coming around
Was her dream to dance just one last dance
And she knew tonight was her only chance
Rising on toes, she danced across the stage
Her body tensing up for the very next page
As she jumped high to twirl up in the air
She suddenly felt his hands holding there
He lifted her higher than she had ever flown
And twirled better than she had ever known
He molded himself to her as if they were one
Remaining there with her til the dance was done
The applause thundered around the room
And she felt as if life had just started to bloom
As the sounds died down, she smiled with tears
Not being able to dance was one of her fears
Then she opened her eyes and looked around
Oxygen hoses, hospital beds are what she found
As she glanced, she saw her toes pointed down
She knew only her attitude kept her bed bound
No matter what happened she could dance free
Closing her eyes, the stage she would see
In today’s time there is a lot of what I call the “busy-busy syndrome”. It is like watching ants running all over the place. Families on the go all the time, people rushing from one thing to the other. And maybe it is the southern in me, but I have to wonder why the need to rush? How can you enjoy anything if you are always rushing. It is like trying to eat a meal in five minutes. You do not even taste the food.
Do people try to shove too much into their day? Maybe they want to do too many things at once. I remember being young and thinking I had all the time in the world to do things and thinking I had time later to spend with loved ones. But, we are not guaranteed that. Time is like sand and slides right through our fingers. Have you ever gotten up one morning and then suddenly it is bed time and you wonder where all the time went? That is how easily we can lose it and if we are rushing all the time, it is even easier.
“Your children can be around you all day, but if you don’t spend quality time with them and if you don’t pay attention to them and talk to them and listen to them, it doesn’t matter that they are just around you.”
There is time and then there is quality time. We all have plain ole time that slips through our fingers but if we are rushing all the time, we are losing that quality time. I would rather have thirty minutes of quiet time talking to my children, than ten hours of everyone rushing around half way talking.
I guess being older than dirt, I look at life differently. I realize that all these things we think we have to do are not going to make one difference when we die. I would rather my loved ones remember me hugging them and telling them I loved them than all the gifts in the world.
Son and I were talking about how families seldom sit down to eat meals together anymore, how televisions and computers occupy so much time that conversation does not happen anymore. When we moved over the mountain and were at the motel seven weeks, we got up every morning and went down to the little dining room and ate breakfast together and sat there drinking coffee and talking. And we got spoiled to that because we would sit there for over an hour just talking.
I am such a country girl and love the slower paced life. That does not mean I do not want to go anywhere or do anything because I do. I just do not want the rushing that seems to go on today. I would love to slowly travel across the country in that bus we have on our dream list. The reason for the little bus like they use to pick up the handicapped, is it has a lift for my chair and motor homes do not. But, slowly go across not zoom and then you can’t remember where you went or what you saw.
I would love to go and spend two weeks in a boarding room right near the Panacea in Italy and be close enough to get to the train and close enough to just meander around the streets right there and soak it all up. I love Italy and on my bucket list is to return there one day. I would love to go to France and see Julia’s France, the back streets and the real people and slowly walk the streets and see all the vendors.
I think I no longer have a hurry button on me and it makes me sad to see so many rushing around and then can not even really tell you what they did that day. Time, it runs out for all of us so what have you done with yours? How fast is the sand running through yours in comparison to what you are doing? We have no guarantees of tomorrow and I do not want to regret not being with those I love and not telling them and showing them how much I love them.
Son and I do grounding which is going back to earth and nature. We sit outside, bare feet on the ground with the wind softly blowing and the sun shining through, and we allow all the negative energy to escape through our feet into the earth. We also take the time to just talk about life. You all should try it some time. Unplug those computers, cellphones, WiFi or turn them off and allow your bodies to just release all of that negative energy that flows through the air from all the electronics we use and let it flow out the bottoms of your feet. I think you will be amazed. Our NA ancestors knew this and knew that we were part of nature and how to heal ourselves.
I believe in fighting and keeping going in life in spite of obstacles. I have been this way all my life and it has been a good thing with all the health issues I deal with. I could do like some people and lay back and whine that I just can not do it and expect others to do it for me but I do not. You can call it self-respect, personal pride…whatever…but the truth is I do not like being thought of as someone who uses other people for what I can do for myself and so I do not. I am just too head-strong.
I am still going and fighting to get better. Some days it is really hard and it would be so easy to lay back and say I can not do it. But, the truth of the matter is, I get a rush every time I push myself to keep going and I accomplish doing it in spite of what the illnesses are doing to me.
My health issues will take me down one day, but they will not without the fight of all fights. I refuse to let it win if I have anything left in me to stop it. Sometimes my son will say I should not do this or that or that I can not do this or that and my response is ”you watch my shirt tail pop son”. That means I am going to try or go down trying. So, I put on my wonder woman head band and say to my illnesses and diseases that are stealing my life ”you take that cause I am NOT giving up!” The diseases will take me down one day but I can guarantee you that they will get an “arse whupping” on the way down from me.
Some days the diseases will win but that is ok because when I lay here at night recouping, I am building my fight back up to give it a run for its money tomorrow and the next day and the next. Hear me diseases for my roar may be small at times but it is still a roar.
I live on faith. Yes, I have faith in God but there is also another kind of faith. It is the faith that I will wake up in the morning ready to fight again. It is the faith that I will endure one more round of high pain and muscle spasms and a hard time breathing one more time. It is the faith that I will not give up but will keep fighting not just for me but for the ones I love. It is the faith that when things are too tough and I can not stand it, I will be carried through it. It is the faith..that I will never lose my faith in God, in those I love, in survival, in truth, in honesty, in justice, in goodness, in peace, in love, in compassion for those things keep the world going. And it is faith in the knowledge that sometimes, faith is all I need.
I bet you all thought I had disappeared again. Well, I had not but I had some really horrible things I saw and read about that just tore my heart in two. I needed time to think about how I wanted to write this. Kindness is something free we can give away to everyone and yet lately I see so much hate, anger, and just plain maliciousness that I have laid here for two days thinking about the things I saw and read. Where has self-respect gone? Where has kindness to mankind and the animal kingdom gone? Where has compassion, love, charity, willingness to step up to the plate to do what no one else is doing gone?
Let me share a few of the things I saw and read over the past few days. One is a sweet couple who were so excited about the birth of their third child. And then, the mother had a miscarriage. I think we all know how some people just think they can say anything online no matter if it is hurting someone or attacking them. And some did say inappropriate things that were hurtful to her. I wish there was a way to help people realize that someone who just lost their child to miscarriage does not need to be told to “suck it up” and other things. In reality, though these next people mean well, telling someone who just lost a child “well you have two other children” is not right. Those two children do not take the place of the child lost. And I sat with tears in my eyes watching people say things that were really mean. I do not mean the one about “Well you have two other children” for that is just not knowing what to say. Best advice I can give you on that is just simply say “I am so sorry” for that says it all. They do not need to hear everyone’s miscarriage story or that they should be happy they still have two kids or they can always get pregnant again. Just say I am so sorry for your loss.
This next thing just blew me away. Whether you think transgender is wrong or not, abusing someone who is transgender is wrong. WRONG. What this woman said was horrific and then she proceeded to physically attack the transgender person. And what does she say to all this? That people should not judge what she said and did because people do not know the shoes she walks in. The video link is in the third little paragraph but be forewarned there is some of the most nasty, evil and cruel things that are said on this video. And this transgender person is afraid to report it to the police. I hope someone else does. If we do not like how someone lives, why not just try keeping it to ourselves instead of such hate and ugliness. Why create even more division.
And then it topped off with a woman wanting to argue with me on whether a 14-year-old is a child or a woman. Sorry folks, but in my book, it is still a child. And this particular child has suffered cancer 7 times since she was 5. I mean seriously why argue over something like that when we are all there praying that this child makes it through the cancer this time and the bone marrow transplant. I mean she has already lost her childhood with all the treatments and surgery. All I could think was “Is your heart so concerned over proving someone else is wrong for calling her a child that you can not see the suffering this child is enduring?” Where has the kindness gone? My reply to her was that this was not something that should be argued over and that we all need to stay focused on the child and praying for her.
My heart has railed and cried over these incidents and many more that seem to happen daily in our country and our world. People are not even allowed to have an opinion. If you do not agree with some people they will beat you to pieces verbally. And so, I have sat with it for a couple of days just me and the Lord asking Why? Why? Why? And as the Lord always does, the peace came to me in a video showing me there are still good people in this world and we have to start spreading the kindness and compassion. Just watch this video and you will understand.
And all I can say now is to encourage people to stand up for what is right and to spread the kindness. Did you notice in the video at the top showing the woman who was so hateful on that subway that not one person stood up and told her to stop. Not one. We may not can change the whole world but we can change our corner of the world.
I have a great deal of emotion about the truth and people being honest. I tell people I live by a creed which is do not lie to me and do not steal from me. It does not matter whether it is my time, my money or my heart just do not steal from me.. Son tells people I have a built-in radar and know instantly when someone lies to me. And my son is probably right and that makes some people very mad with me because they know they can not lie to me and get away with it. The reason I hate lies is the following:
This one sentence changes the whole scope of things. When someone lies to me, than I know in their eyes I am not worth knowing the truth. And anytime anyone lies, that is what they are saying whether they mean to or not. Once a person lies to me, they have lost all credibility with me. I would rather hear the truth even if hurtful than to be lied to.
I guess I am a funny person. As long as you are truthful to me, I will stand by you through whatever comes. That does not mean I will defend you if you are wrong. It means that I will not leave you even if you get in trouble. I will stand by you so you do not have to go through it alone.
Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it. ~Buddha
This is very evident to see in what is going on in our country and the world right now as politicians are campaigning for office. We can not longer trust mainstream media to tell us the truth. They will present what they stand for instead of being the watch dogs they used to be years ago. So, if you can not believe the media about these politicians or these political parties, what do you do? You research for yourself the people you want to vote for and then make your decision but do not let others lead you into that decision. Not all GOP are bad nor are they all good anymore than all Democrats are good or all or bad. This is why I do not vote by party.
The truth and standing up for what is right go hand in hand. One should not stand up for something that they have no clue as to whether it is true or not. We were given a brain and that brain was so that we might reason and study and learn and not just accept the appearance of something without first checking the foundation. Believe in what you know to be true not what someone else tells you to believe. And once you spot a lie, then put your guard up for that means anything that the person or place has told you is suspect.
I know I have been missing in action and I do apologize to all of you. First I was recuperating from surgery and it was taking a lot longer than I thought it would. And when you feel so bad, the brain just does not work to well. Fortunately I am over the surgery and feeling much better and can now work towards getting work done on the spine. And just to show you, here is a picture of me feeling so much better since the surgery. Amazing how much better I look with all the infection gone and healing taking place. This was taken a few days ago.
Second reason I have been MIA is I have been so exhausted, more than normal due to the van transmission dying on us and having to ride in son’s jeep. To repair it is more than the value of the van. Our only mode of transportation now is the Jeep Wrangler. And if you know anything about jeeps, you know it is not made for someone with my disabilities. But, I am resilient and I do manage to get into it. I only go out for doctors right now. We are working on selling things we no longer need and then my son is going to sell his jeep and get a vehicle easier for me to get into. But, that brings us back to the exhaustion point. When I have to go beyond my normal means to do things, it zaps me and I tend to crash and sleep to try to rebuild the strength. Another reason I have been MIA.
And the third reason is that my son here has helped me compile my poetry book that I have worked on for almost two years. Some of you have read my poetry so you know how I write. Well….*drum roll* ….the book is complete, we just got the proof copies for one last look and then it will be time to hit the publish button on Amazon so that the book goes on sale. I am so proud. I feel like I gave birth only it was less painful. *Giggling*. And here are a few pictures to show you front and back and one to show how thick it is. It came out to be around 80 pages. I know poetry books do not become huge sellers but I will be happy if it just sells some. The author is shown as “simply danLrene” because that is the writing name I use but there is a picture of me sans the oxygen hose in the back with my name and a little write-up.
The font is a size 12 because I wanted people to be able to read with ease. The picture on the front is the view from my front door. There are other pictures I have taken in the book too. And on the back is one of my quotes that I love so much. I could not have done this without my son here helping me put it together. My hope is that it sells enough to help with the vehicle fund.
So, as you can see, it has been a very complicated few weeks. But I am back ready to write again. I will post the link on Amazon once the book is published and ready to go on sale.
Before I can tell you of Juliana and her siblings, I must first tell you of John and Tammy Carver. I came across their story on YouTube and it touched my heart to the core. Maybe it touched it so much because of the health issues I have been through and my sons have been through. All I know is that John and Tammy are two of the most loving and caring parents. You only have to watch them to know how much they love their children. Back in the late 90’s I believe it was, they decided they wanted to adopt children. They started off adopting two and then kept going back and getting more until they had six children from Russia. Juliana is one of the younger ones. And they are all wonderful children.
In 2007 when Juliana was barely five years old, she was diagnosed with cancer. I can not imagine my child being diagnosed with cancer much less at the age of five. Juliana is now I believe 14 and she has battled cancer seven times through these past 9 years and has had many treatments and surgeries. She is such a warrior child and I love her strong attitude.
video from John Carver
They thought they were cancer free at the end of 2015 but it did not work out that way and so the battle goes on. Only now, the doctors told her parents that the cure might be a bone marrow transplant. This is how loving these parents are. They knew it had to be a blood relative that donated the bone marrow. They had adopted her older sister but she was not a match. And so John went looking for Juliana’s real mother and they found her. They are always right there with her through each medical thing.
image from Angels For Juliana
image from Angels For Juliana
The birth mother flew over to the bone marrow donation and while she was here they learned that she had a very rough life and because she was working so hard to care for her parents and her children, she left them with her mother. Her mother had some serious problems and the children got taken away and the mother did not know where they were. The Carvers paid for her to fly to America and donated the bone marrow only with the cancer back, the bone marrow transplant had to be put off for the second time. And this is where they are now.
Two Mothers–One Mission
video from John Carver
This is the post they made about the transplant being postponed:
“Thursday April 7, 2016 7 Juliana goes back to Johns Hopkins for a blood and platelet transfusion. ALL her 120+ transfusions have been done at Sinai Hospital in Baltimore Maryland since 2007 so this will be the first time she’s received transfusions at Johns Hopkins Hospital.
Friday, Juliana has Hickman lines put in her chest (again) in preparation for the bone marrow transplant. She had Hickman lines when she had cancer the 3rd time. Friday afternoon she, also, goes to the Radiology dept to get set up for 5 new radiation treatments. As I understand it she will be getting 5 radiation treatments starting on or hopefully before April 14. That puts us up to about April 20.”
I am writing about them because I know they need some help. People sent many presents for all the kids but with all this happening again, they asked people instead of sending gifts if they could, would they send gift cards for gas and food places to eat as they have to travel back and forth to the hospital. Caseycares.org was kind enough to give them tickets to the Aquarium there for all of them including the kids. It was a nice break for them from the hospital.
So, if anyone is interested in helping them, here is their PO Box.
P.O. Box 39
Manchester MD 21102
Here are links you can watch to see the story of Juliana and her cancer journey.
If you click on the You-tube link, on the right hand side of the page you will see many other vlogs about Juliana and what is going on. Also her Facebook page is located here and they welcome any and all prayers and support.: https://www.facebook.com/Angels-For-Juliana-250289225091998/?fref=ts